Hearts are broken all the time

As I sit here I think that it's quite possible I'll be alone forever
No one can relate to me
no on can understand
what truths the darkness holds
what screaming fear does not give faith to
I think the alcohol on my breath stinks
this dorm room is shit
the people on the street are worthless
and I am alone
Full of pity for myself
Reviewing all of my life's insignificance and pain
one and the same
My bloodshot eyes stess to squint
tears form and I'm whole again
a being, living, dying, real life god fearing
I want away
I want far away
life is not worth anything anythinganything
I want to throw this macbook out the window
I want to ball tears
I wan't to taste the salt of loss and never had
the salt of work is not worth living for
I expire to myself
I extinguish all on my own
I call to the dark in mumbled recitations
of all the loss I have had dealt and dealt with myself
I want to push the daisies
I want to hold the dirt like a blanket
I want to not have to think or feel about this place, my situations, or my motives ever, ever, again.

Carrion's Joy

The dead leave scars on the brain of the city
Through the fog and the rain and the traffic
A thousand unseen eyes circle the sky
The concrete and windows
The steel and the tar
Can not let us escape the futility of living
The dead bury us with them
We sink into the soft earth
Shame, depression, and guilt escape
Tired lids waiting to be closed
Flitter and still on dry corneas
You can't take the internet to heaven
Blackberry's will not hold your soul
My ipod has no use in my funerary case
Your draining occupation will never make you whole
We dance on the train in shoes to big for our feet
The ground shakes as if it's possesed
By some foreign beat
Kachook dum dum Kachook dum dum
I've worked hard lord!
Kachook dum dum
Oh, I've held on strong!
Kachook dum dum
Aaaaa my baby! Lord, my baby is gone!
kachook dum dum
OooOoo Oh! In this cold world my love
kachook dum dum
yeah, you know you've got to carry on
kachook dum dum
OOOh Iiii know, even when I'm right
kachook dum dum
Every little thing can go wrong

The song fades, the lights dim
After momentary introspection
Thoughts move to another direction
Avoidance, annoyance, clairvoyant ly
I see where this path leads
blah, blah, blah, on and on
two minus one is one
get a little scared and you run

The cold windows don't care where you go
the ghosts follow, they walk, run, or float
they breathe and smell your emotions
they ride on your coattails
they hold on to your heart and your head
every empty bottle
holds the spirit of the dead