2.23.2010

farewell foolish objectivism

it's a sad state when man is raized to hate, discriminate, and eliminate all things strange, thinking they hold no solid place.
I can never be a hero
foolish things often run deep for me,
my lost thoughts as barren and systematic as winter trees
all subconscious comes forward through lack of dreams
cigarettes and antacids at six a.m.
water and eggs drowning down and coagulating
i feel bad and good all the same
transcending perception, making myself outsane
out in the streets howling to the early morning air
to the sleeping, sleepless, drunk, and meandering
breaking up the spaces between all of us stuck
in this blistering burning reality, with cars and tv screens
with debt and monetary dreams, lotteries to keep em clean
to keep them from destroying themselves
spiraling down the rabbit holes reading gravestones as no escape
only hope lies in the book that says the meek shall be saved
the high, the hearty, the full, and greed will try and repent for deeds
what a load of shit shoveled for the poor to believe
everything is amazing and no one is happy

2.11.2010

war they said

I used to think of war in the hollywood sense without any sense.  I used to see these heroic actions, which no doubt in many cases involved the bravery and willpower of the human spirit, and these actions are admirable from the nature of man, but being that, the nature of man, we aknowledge that we all stem from the same thing, and that thing, exists still beyond our scientific unified comprehension.  Man is a warring creature who takes from the violent nature of the very substances which he is created from.  The twisted earth bulging hot inside from the still fresh universe, lit up by the burning light of the sun.  Earthquakes and Hydrogen Dioxide, wind, volcanoes, we live in a violent, turbulent time in the universe.
__I used to not think about things.  I've been watching footage from WWII.  The atom bomb and damages done by the US.  The hand of god dropped down and burnt you up inside and out if you were even close enough to see it.  I think that never in history have so many people been killed at one time.  Should we have bombed North Korea in the Korean War, or now?  Should we bomb Iran?  Is this the problem that constantly faces the American person?  What significance do the moral implications reflect on us as a religious, capitalist, warring system?  Capitalism ensures a fair society, but a hollow society as well.  I don't blame capitalism, I blame greed and the way that power and money make you hollow, what good is there in life when you are on a pedestal and don't have to struggle through the twisted world in which we are forced to exist on?  What choice have I to be spurt forth on a warring planet and laying my hands in what guilt and Hollywood manufactured in my youth and what those warring people bought me to do. 
  I think few of us really have to struggle with the moral implications of mass destruction, but we buy people to do that.  Grown old men, lawyers and families of former politicians, we buy them to make our decisions.  I was bought young to battle in strange lands and would never again offer my soul.  Not with the mysteries of the universe still at large, not with that distrust and distaste still bitter and hot in my throat. 
   Do we live in fear of the next atom bomb?  I'm sure there are still wounds buried deep in foreign soil.  Here we are sweeping up history's ever growing mess.  Albert Einstein helped find the power of god, now we live in fear.  What weapons will the discoverer of the unified theory create?  Will we crash the moon down on the earth in a final assault, is total destruction the only solution?  The mind makes the world the world makes the mind. 

2.02.2010

Taught and Twisted Creatures

Little memories of a smaller me flash like old film.  I've always wanted to learn regardless of where I was or what I was doing.  I have big eyes and a big heart and I wanted to know the world from every angle.  Now glowing ghosts in dry eyes are manifestations of a complex sadness.  Everything rubs off on you.  Your DNA learns from everything around you even if you don't notice it.  I think we are always changing and cells always rebuilding, maybe we have gotten out of the grips of nature, either that or nature thrives on chaos, given the chaotic nature of the human.
We are not always analytical, and neither are we focusing all energy on survival.  What makes us love?  Stress and struggle.  Struggle to survive and be, persistence, growth, and care.  No one needs anyone anymore.  So instead we use sex as therapy.  
So we outgrew our bodies and our minds had nowhere to grow.  Now the thick weed of the mind is crying out to the body through migranes, obecity, insomnia, and depression.  It's screaming for more soil with which to root, but physical limitations and the slow nature of evolution leave us dire.  As our technology seems to outgrow us, our minds outgrow our bodies, and thus the current insufferable social-economical and political climates throughout the world.  Racism, genocide, torture, and war.  Nuclear weapons, chemical weapons.  Some people and entire societies are barely out of the caves we lived in 60,000 years ago, while the world grows at an unbelievable rate. 

taught and twisted creatures
fumbling through the night
the vultures and the weasels
got steely eyes alright
if you don't have any ideas
then why do you exist
the part that you just cant start
is the reason for my bliss